leonprimrose asking opinions and thoughts

Talk about all art or ask for advice.

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leonprimrose
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leonprimrose asking opinions and thoughts

Post by leonprimrose » Sun Oct 26, 2008 5:56 am

Image

I don't think I'm bad. but I feel like I lack a form of life in my cartooning.

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redfox
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Post by redfox » Sun Oct 26, 2008 8:19 am

its not bad at all. i guess the proportion is a bit off though. the head looks a bit big for the body. but thats just my opinion. its already good enough.

a random ninja

Post by a random ninja » Sun Oct 26, 2008 3:02 pm

i'd say if anything needs to be worked on, it's the feet. they look very flat compared to the rest of the body.

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Post by Caffeine » Sun Oct 26, 2008 11:46 pm

I think her head is too big for her body, and I would crop it to eliminate some of the white for composition.
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Post by leonprimrose » Mon Oct 27, 2008 12:41 am

We'll forget about the cropping because that's not what I meant by opinions. I only wanted opinions on the art itself :-P but I've taken into consideration about the head and have done a really quick sketch of the same character and position. please let me know if this is better proportion, worse, or none. Tell me any changes you see for good or bad. thank you again :)

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Post by R0B3R7 » Mon Oct 27, 2008 3:50 am

i like the 2nd one better :P

btw your name instantly reminded me of the neopluridan from charlie the unicorn :D
dA
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Post by leonprimrose » Mon Oct 27, 2008 4:13 am

lol it's a magical leoplurodan Charlie! It will show us the way!

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Post by a random ninja » Mon Oct 27, 2008 4:41 am

to be fair, the composition IS part of the art...but yes, the second one seems to have better proportions.

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Post by leonprimrose » Mon Oct 27, 2008 5:18 am

I'm well aware that composition is part of art. but you know what I meant. There's no need to attempt technicalities to prove yourself right. I was implying that in this specific image I don't care about the composition. It's exclusively about the character.

but alright thanks :) I'll keep working on quelling some of my old bad habits with proportioning. lol It's a pain breaking old habits from before I knew anatomy. XD but then that's why I'm asking others for help.

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Post by major banana » Mon Oct 27, 2008 1:07 pm

When i saw the face i thought OHYEA tutorialworthy stuff even though she's probably a puppet/robot. Must be the detailed hair vs the more simplified face.

When i saw the jacket i thought ohyea ok, and i was confused by all the different perspectives, shoulders neck breast (your new sketch fixed that but made her puppet/robot rate increase by 50%).

When i came to the legs and that awful black line around it, i thought why did he/she do that, it makes it extremely 2d. But the legs look 2d aswell, especially the feet. Some flcl-ish background would be nice too.

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Post by Aether » Mon Oct 27, 2008 1:15 pm

To be honest. Your character annoys me. It's too generic anime for me. Then the sketch, you look at that and you're like. Dude, Astro Boy written all over. Like, it's not bad and all... but this just doesn't seem like character material. To me it looks like just a background character. Not really made to be noticed.

So no, your design doesn't appeal to me. But before you start bitching at everyone about finding flaws, it is what we do here. It's called helping and it's the harsh reality of things that make us all improve. You would never get better if everything were sunshine and lollipops.

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Post by leonprimrose » Mon Oct 27, 2008 1:53 pm

Aether wrote:To be honest. Your character annoys me. It's too generic anime for me. Then the sketch, you look at that and you're like. Dude, Astro Boy written all over. Like, it's not bad and all... but this just doesn't seem like character material. To me it looks like just a background character. Not really made to be noticed.

So no, your design doesn't appeal to me. But before you start bitching at everyone about finding flaws, it is what we do here. It's called helping and it's the harsh reality of things that make us all improve. You would never get better if everything were sunshine and lollipops.
#1 I haven't bitched at anyone for tearing me apart
#2 I'm appalled that you would think that I would ask for criticism and then bitch about what I hear. Don't assume someone's going to bitch about criticism before they actually bitch about criticism. You come off as pretentious.

But here's all I ask, is that if anyone is to tear me apart I want to know exactly what is wrong with it. You didn't really tell me anything aside from that you didn't like it and it was plain. Elaborate or your criticism is meaningless in attempting to help me.

also the character is someone's gaiaonline avatar. I rarely do avi art or even go to gaia anymore but one day I felt like i and this came out.

and I know my characters lack "Life" if you had read that's what I was asking about to help fix.
major banana wrote:When i saw the face i thought OHYEA tutorialworthy stuff even though she's probably a puppet/robot. Must be the detailed hair vs the more simplified face.

When i saw the jacket i thought ohyea ok, and i was confused by all the different perspectives, shoulders neck breast (your new sketch fixed that but made her puppet/robot rate increase by 50%).

When i came to the legs and that awful black line around it, i thought why did he/she do that, it makes it extremely 2d. But the legs look 2d aswell, especially the feet. Some flcl-ish background would be nice too.
lol actually that hair is far more detailed than I normally do. Guess it makes some sense that it'd look a little weird :-P

you're going to have to explain what you meant by the puppet/robot rate. I'm not quite sure I understand what you mean. but I'm glad I fixed at least part of the problem in the sketch

lol Does the black line do that? I didn't even notice honestly. I thought it would look very strange if I didn't complete the entire figure. and please elaborate and the legs being 2D. I'd like to know so that I can fix it :)

Thanks for your input (^_^) btw I'm a he. :P

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Aether
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Post by Aether » Mon Oct 27, 2008 2:04 pm

Oh really?
1.
leonprimrose wrote:#1 I haven't bitched at anyone for tearing me apart
Ownage wrote:I'm well aware that composition is part of art. but you know what I meant. There's no need to attempt technicalities to prove yourself right.
2.
leonprimrose wrote:#2 I'm appalled that you would think that I would ask for criticism and then bitch about what I hear. Don't assume someone's going to bitch about criticism before they actually bitch about criticism. You come off as pretentious.
Again, the same ownage wrote:I'm well aware that composition is part of art. but you know what I meant. There's no need to attempt technicalities to prove yourself right.
3.
leonprimrose wrote:But here's all I ask, is that if anyone is to tear me apart I want to know exactly what is wrong with it.
Ownage wrote:redfox:
its not bad at all. i guess the proportion is a bit off though. the head looks a bit big for the body.
a random ninja:
i'd say if anything needs to be worked on, it's the feet. they look very flat compared to the rest of the body.
Caffeine:
I think her head is too big for her body, and I would crop it to eliminate some of the white for composition.
4.
leonprimrose wrote:You didn't really tell me anything aside from that you didn't like it and it was plain.
Ownage wrote:I was implying that in this specific image I don't care about the composition. It's exclusively about the character.
You're an idiot.

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leonprimrose
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Post by leonprimrose » Mon Oct 27, 2008 2:11 pm

Aether wrote:Oh really?
1.
leonprimrose wrote:#1 I haven't bitched at anyone for tearing me apart
Ownage wrote:I'm well aware that composition is part of art. but you know what I meant. There's no need to attempt technicalities to prove yourself right.
2.
leonprimrose wrote:#2 I'm appalled that you would think that I would ask for criticism and then bitch about what I hear. Don't assume someone's going to bitch about criticism before they actually bitch about criticism. You come off as pretentious.
Again, the same ownage wrote:I'm well aware that composition is part of art. but you know what I meant. There's no need to attempt technicalities to prove yourself right.
3.
leonprimrose wrote:But here's all I ask, is that if anyone is to tear me apart I want to know exactly what is wrong with it.
Ownage wrote:redfox:
its not bad at all. i guess the proportion is a bit off though. the head looks a bit big for the body.
a random ninja:
i'd say if anything needs to be worked on, it's the feet. they look very flat compared to the rest of the body.
Caffeine:
I think her head is too big for her body, and I would crop it to eliminate some of the white for composition.
4.
leonprimrose wrote:You didn't really tell me anything aside from that you didn't like it and it was plain.
Ownage wrote:I was implying that in this specific image I don't care about the composition. It's exclusively about the character.
You're an idiot.
Come on. really? It was very clear that I didn't care about composition. I also took into consideration the head and because of it made a new sketch because of that advice specifically.

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major banana
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Post by major banana » Mon Oct 27, 2008 5:54 pm

Don't argue with Aether, just get used to him. You could have had it torn apart by The Raging Spaniard, that's Aethers 'honesty' times 500.


Puppet/robot rate means that it looks like she comes from a mold. Like the Ghost in the Shell sexrobots or those animegirl masks (scary shit). Because you detailed the hair and not the face, it looks like a wig. Her eyes, mouth and nose make her face look flat, like a doll. Then there's her typical manga jawline which makes her look even more like a doll. But it's mostly the eyes, she doesn't have pupils either.

The legs, you have to show that it's bone with muscle and skin. Give her calfs, ankles, 3dimensional shoes, fix the shading and it's done. You're drawing a super perfect anime girl, so she needs super perfect Faye Valentine legs aswell.

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